By: Dr. Jasmin
I will admit, it is tempting to go for a fast solution or one that requires less work. In today’s day and age, we are so used to clicking on something to buy clothes, order food etc. And when things take longer, we become impatient. Just the other day, I was helping a family member with some computer issues and their computer was lagging a bit. Waiting those extra 20 seconds really tested my patience. It made me aware of how demanding I was in terms of a fast solution.
It comes to no surprise then, that when it comes to bigger goals, that we too want it fast. This includes the career choices we make. I’ve have had clients that were recent college grads or in high school. They had gotten to the point where they were tired of the indecision, and just wanted to pick a career so they had something to focus on and move forward. They didn’t want to wait; they were afraid of wasting time. I can resonate with this, because I was in a similar boat when I decided on my first career. Some don’t want to pursue their dream career because they tell themselves that it would take too long, and so they settle for something that is achievable much faster. The problem with trying to make such an important decision based on how fast you’ll get there, thinking that you will save time, is that you often will do the opposite. You’ll likely end up in a career for example, that doesn’t fulfill you. And rather than having saved time, you will spend a lot of years trying to get out of it…if you’re lucky. Most will just become resigned and continue to suffer.
The same goes for relationships. I can’t tell you how many people I know and worked with that said that the reason they got married was because everyone around them was getting married. Due to feeling the societal pressure, they were rushing to do it too, not wanting to be left behind. Again, this often leads to many years of suffering. Most people despite being unhappy, unfortunately never believe they are strong enough to leave the relationship and so they don’t. Causing them to continue suffering.
The point that I am making is that by choosing what’s fast, easy, and convenient, it may give temporary relief but in the long term you will go through a lot more hardship. My advice especially when it comes to big decisions like relationships and career, is that you don’t settle, and strive for what you want. Don’t give up. Even if it means starting again. I’m so glad I didn’t give up. Otherwise, I would have continued to feel burned out at work, instead of loving what I do now. For additional support in terms of creating shifts in your beliefs, so that you believe and take action towards achieving your goal, click on the link for a free intake session.