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Are You Resilient?

Resilience has been linked to success, so it is a question worth asking yourself. Many of us go through hard times at some point in our lives, and those that are able to deal with setbacks better, have a greater chance of bouncing back.

When bad things happen to us, dwelling on the negatives comes natural but it does not serve us. In fact, if we allow ourselves to keep dwelling on the negatives, we can easily find ourselves in a slump. This can last not only days, but for some weeks, months, and even years. Part of being resilient, is learning the skill to not focus on the negatives and to break these negative thought patterns. Doing some physical activity like running for example, can help break the negative thought behavior. It is one of the tools I suggest you try on, when you find yourself having negative thoughts.

Let’s look at some other habits that interfere with resilience. Do you complain or compare yourself to those that you think have it easy? Maybe you think, how is it fair that this person has everything given to them? You can then go into thinking how you too deserve those things, have been working hard, and how unfair life is. It is damaging to us if we engage in that type of thinking. We don’t even know the reality. Maybe this person has some deep internal wounds that are bigger than yours. So instead of wasting your time focusing on others, focus on yourself and your goals.

It also helps to become good at learning from your failures. It’s what successful people do. Instead of thinking that they failed, and telling themselves they’re simply not good at that skillset, they think what can I learn from this? What areas can I improve in so that this doesn’t happen next time? What resources can I use to give myself a different result next time? With that type of attitude, it is no wonder that some of the most successful people have also failed the most. Using their failures as major learning experiences, eventually led them to succeed.

Another thing you can do on your path to becoming more resilient, is to develop a positive image of the future. If you think that this will never change, or you’ll never be happy, then what’s the use of even trying? On the other hand, if you have an optimistic view towards the future, you’re much more likely to take action and therefore more likely to achieve your goals.

It’s easy to get down on the difficulties you have faced. And while I have no intention of being insensitive to those troublesome circumstances, it serves you to look for the benefits. If you’ve gone through some obstacles and overcame them, you may have noticed that it made you more resilient. You learned coping mechanisms and are now maybe better equipped to handle stress. Think about people that have had everything handed to them and had seemingly few obstacles in their life. Typically, when things go wrong in their life where there is no easy solution in sight, they lose it. They have not learned how to cope effectively with stressful situations. I would also argue that many times those that have been spoiled as a child and later as a teen, tend to have a difficult time in adulthood. It’s partly because they did not develop resilience. When you look back at your challenges, reflect on how it helped you grow, made you more resilient, and other ways you benefited.

We always have the choice of how we chose to react. Learning how to handle challenges, and choosing to handle them effectively will help propel you further in life. Resiliency is one of the keys to success, and the sooner you learn how to bounce back, the better off you will be. For further help with becoming more resilient and learning coping mechanisms, click on this link a free intake session.

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